How to be Kedar

so we use the scientific method extensively to deduce hypothesis and induce phenomena, about the outside world.

wouldn’t it be possible to use the scientific method to discover yourself?

let me show you how this is possible. looking at myself from a third person perspective, I see the types of things that I do from day to day. while it’s hard to make out the details that I don’t pay attention to, the bigger picture is clear.

I spend an enormous amount of my time thinking and writing about philosophy. why? because I have had a silly dream, since I was an early teenager (or maybe even earlier than that), that I would someday write a book on philosophy.

and so, observing my own actions, I see that I put a great deal of effort into writing this philosophical book.

it is from this point that I can make hypothesis about why these actions are taken. these hypothesis are validated by observations inferred.

this experiment is, by scientific standards, well… not very scientific. first of all, there is no quantitative measure. we cannot use data analysis. second of all, the recording instrument (my mind) directly interferes with the medium of the experiment (again, my mind). so strictly speaking, I am not really using the scientific method. I am, however, inspired by certain aspects of the method – making hypothesis, testing hypothesis, observation, conclusion, etc.

anyway, so I have validated through my observation that I want to write a philosophy book. now I want to question the motives behind this – to dissect all the components that come together to push me in that direction.

many of them come to mind, also validated by other feelings and actions.

one of the obvious motives is to make money. although I know that books are often flops, and writers make a hard living, I still have the idea that I could somehow succeed with this book. maybe I could write it on the side while I’m doing another job (being a computer engineer). maybe I could hold seminars and conferences, give speeches, even get ad revenue from making a self-help blog.

what is the reason that I want to make money writing a book? the most obvious reason is that I don’t want to work for a living. I’d rather set up a system that makes money for me. another big reason is that I don’t want to have to worry about money. I see that my parents have money problems, and I don’t want to be like that. I’d like enough money to just be comfortable – to not ever be on the tight end. one last reason that I can come up with is that I want to be able to help myself and those that I love. medical bills cost a lot these days. I don’t to make my parents (or family) worry about their declining health, and about paying off those bills. I also don’t want them to be in money binds. I’d like to buy my mother a massage chair because she gets all those knots in her back. I’d buy my dad something too. I want them to be comfortable in their old age.

it’s not just about the money. I have this deep craving to be well-liked by other people. it is probably both conditioned by society (the pressure to keep up appearances and to not look like a dolt) and by my own childhood (being teased and an object for ridicule). so I feel like if I accomplish something, especially something as ambitious as this, people will like and admire me. more than being successful, I would like to be considered successful.

so at this point, being well-liked relates to a similar craving – to be influential and considered great. in other words, to make up a good name for myself. to have a legacy while I am alive, and to leave a legacy when I am dead. this is like an antithesis to one of my deep fears – that is to die without accomplishing something, or more importantly to die without being remembered. better to die being remembered for something good; no, something great.

I have gotten to the heart of one of my greatest goals – to feel like I matter; to feel like I belong; to feel like I am wanted; to feel like I am not alone; to feel like other people need me; to feel like other people are thankful for me; to feel like other people love me.

while I can go on and on with that tangent, I’ll get right to the obvious source. because I am so involved with philosophy, it says something about my character – not only am I a thinking person, but I am a person who directs his thoughts toward finding meaning and purpose. I often feel lost and confused, as though I have lost my path. when I think about philosophy, it makes me happy because I feel like I am coming closer to discovering my way; I am closer to discovering the best way to live life. so a great part of my love for philosophy is that I feel more comfortable having this sense of, as I said, meaning and purpose.

I feel like I would reach a stage, having developed my philosophy far enough, where I would be able to help many people, and that I would be able to live a proper life. at that point, I could share my philosophy with others and potentially help many people find their way. that gives me a sense of worth.

there are many other things that I could say, but this is sort of an example of how I’ve openly realized so much about myself only through observations of my character, of my thoughts and feelings.

Why am I here?

I don’t mean to sound depressed, because I’m not. I just wonder why I’m right here, right now. Look at me. Look at everything around. It’s like everything just randomly blipped into existence and time went on and here I am. what does it all mean? what is it all for?

I read that life was created because of negative entropy (negentropy for short). basically, the transition from the hot sun to the cold Earth creates the potential to work. The second law of thermodynamics says that the universe wants to make thermal energy less available to work. So life exists to export high entropy (by working and thereby giving off heat) while maintaining a low internal entropy. Life then evolves into more creative ways to accomplish that goal.

But really. Think about that. Do I really exist because laws of biology and physics say that I should? Do I exist only to work and to give off heat? That sounds depressing.

What is my purpose? What am I supposed to be doing?

Okay. Let’s assume that life really is all about negentropy.
Here are some scientific conclusions I can make, based on physical and biological laws:

1. We should be more active. Active people exert more energy. Life is about being lively – energetic, vigorous, enthusiastic. Active people also enjoy greater benefits: for instance, sexual appeal. Active people are also happier, and tend to achieve more in life. Life is survival of the fittest – so stay fit.
2. Get outside. If negentropy is created from the transition of the hot sun to the cold Earth, being out in the sun is a prime source for negentropy. Plus, nature is very beautiful.
3. Get rid of sources that drain you. energy drainers slow down productivity, and make life less enjoyable. there are a lot of things and people that can drain you – try to stay away.
4. We should maintain ourselves. The better we keep our life organized, the better potential we have for future work. We need to do what we can to keep ourselves healthy, active, in a good financial situation, etc. Life in the proto languages means ‘continuance’ and ‘perseverence’. That’s exactly what we should be doing – persevering.
5. We should look after others, and get them active too. The more we look after other people, the more entropy that can be given off. So we should make a lot of friends and be really close with family, help them out when they are in trouble, and be kind and loving to all life in general (including pets). We should also get people involved in social activities.
6. We should have a job that helps people – a job that keeps us active – a job that we love. It’s not enough to have a job that just keeps us busy. It is a psychological fact that if you love your job, you’re more likely to find a sense of meaning and purpose, and to be more successful than other people. A job that you’re good at, a job that you’re passionate about – that is best.
7. We should support a government that helps people. That’s basically the function of a government. I probably don’t have to explain this.
8. We should support initiatives that help people. More science is a good thing. Better technology is a good thing. Higher standards of education is a good thing. The government, social organizations, interest groups, and people in general should support causes that help people.
9. We should improve, and help others improve. The better we improve and adapt, the more likely we are to survive and thrive. There are a lot of ways to improve – to keep healthy, to learn more knowledge and skills, to have a good amount of money, etc.
10. We need to use less resources, and maintain the environment. If we use up all of the raw resources, life won’t exist. The environment affects everyone, so we don’t want to mess it up.
11. We should fall in love. Love is a mutual relationship that keeps people alive, healthy, and happy. True love is more than a feeling of love – it is acts of love.
12. We should have children (if it’s possible to look after them properly) and take good care of them. Children are a new source of negentropy. It is natural and good to have children, but only if it’s possible to take care of them.
13. We should follow the Serenity Prayer.
    “God, give us grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed, courage to change the things that should be changed, and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other.”
    If there is one thing we can learn from science, it is that everything happens for a reason. Some things we can and should change, others we can’t change. Whatever laws that the universe follows, whether we know it or not, it is much much bigger than any one of us. So instead of sitting around dwelling on the sad, we should get up and get glad.
14. We should get used to chaos and disorder. Physics and thermodynamics say that eventually everything will fall apart. There’s no way to stop that. In fact, as lifeforms, we are contributing to that process even when we aren’t consciously moving – for instance, the digestion of food. Naturally, we would fear disorder because it keeps us at a low entropy. However, sometimes things go wrong and we can’t do anything. rather than panic, it’s better to accept fate.